Leave a Message, After the Beep.

I've been asked to give a speech on leadership at a soccer club in the area.

So lets back up an break that down:

"I've been asked"

More like, told. In that "who would turn down this opportunity" tone of voice.... by someone I sadly have little respect for.

"To give a speech"

I hate talking in front of people. I get nervous and flustered and somehow that comes off as a more genuine tone and people end up liking the speech. But I still hate it. I never remember it when I am done and I spend the whole time feeling like I am standing beside myself, urging me to continue, urging me to stay in character. No one actually talks as their "selves" but actually as the "self" they wish to project at that moment in time. It is a speech that I will be giving, but its interactive-- gives other people a voice as part of the presentation. Its not only indicative of my leadership style, but it also lets me hide from my own voice.

You can talk AT people, talk TO people or talk WITH people. Consider the situation of the voice mail-- most people (on my voice mail, anyway) communicate a condensed version of what they need to say but then indicate that they would like to discuss it more in detail. My motivation is either piqued or doused by such messages-- will talking to them more provide any further insight or details that I care about? These messages are the "hook" to a future conversation. Much like the first few lines of newspaper article. A speech can either be a "Hook" followed by content washing over the crowd, a series of "hooks" strung together that just leaves the crowd wondering about what will eventually be said, or a speech can be a conversation. A conversation where at the end, the crowd is left to make their own judgements and decisions.

I wish I could say I was a powerful enough writer, speaker, to be able to pull off the last sort every time. But I think I've only done it once. And it was in a super-dramatic-Hollywood-ready speech during a huddle during a soccer game. That we lost, I might add.

"On leadership"

So you would think that I would be good at the whole "define leadership and promote others to step up and be leaders" thing by now. But I never know what to say. I have this speech I wrote as a senior in high school that I think accurately describes how I personally feel about leadership, but I wasn't allowed to give it. The speech was for the class below me's induction into IB and the teachers voted me the best person to give this speech. (I still disagree with that vote, but that has more to do with my understanding of my position socially at that school rather than ability) I wasn't allowed to give my first speech because it basically said "Either you have it or you don't, and no one can tell you if you do or not. Get up off your ass and figure it out"

Which, granted, is a harsh message to hear from someone only a few months older. So instead I gave my other speech...the "Everyone is a leader in their own right" speech where I casually listed off examples of types of leadership not normally respected or highlighted. It was "okay" at best.

Ive given other speeches at various conferences in my life. And I have always felt that I accurately discussed leadership from an Ivory Tower point of view. Not from a groundlings point of view. Which is strange, as I have never had an Ivory Tower leadership position in my life.

"at a Soccer Club in the area"

I am leaving them anonymous because the circumstances that led to the opportunity are sketchy at best and I don't feel like explaining myself. Not that you, my dear reader, don't deserve it, its just that I am still look at my cleats hanging from my window with a pang of regret.

Anyway, the speech can thus be catered towards soccer players, coaches and referees. Or it doesn't have to be. How likely is it that these kids, parents and active adults don't see that the lessons learned on the pitch apply to life?

In other words, I don't know what I am going to say.

I know how I lead. But I respect that I lead by a very specific style and that its not translatable in a lot of situations. I know there are other ways to lead. I am learning constantly about other ways to lead....its an on going process. Like healing.

Am I ready for this? Can I switch, completely, to the role of the coach, the motivational speaker?